Desi Manifesto Blog: The Forum for South Asian American Men

[Blogger: S.I.] We’ve been delinquent. It’s a very busy time in the lives of the Desi Manifesto crew. Of course, if we had more people to blog, there wouldn’t be lag like this, would there? I put the blame squarely on you.

In the last few weeks, I’ve encountered snippets of race-related situations, and even I had a lot of trouble deciding whether I considered them racist or not. So I throw them out to you for some feedback.

LASIK AND EYE OPENING COMMENTS

I recently got LASIK performed at a prominent clinic in LA. Highly ranked doctors, technicians, etc. A few days before the procedure, I underwent an extremely detailed eye exam, including dilating of the pupils.

As the tech tilted my head back to instill the drops, she noticed how easy it was. She said: “Oh, you have such big eyes, it’s so easy to put in the drops. You’re not going to have a problem at all. Not like our Asian patients with those tiny eyes.”

“The Love Guru” flopped last weekend, assuming the “downward spiraling dog” pose, and this coming weekend’s box office receipts should shut the lid on that coffin. Well done.

This monumental failure dredged up memories of my encounter a few years ago with a real life love guru, and the hilarity that ensued. No, he wasn’t about “love” directly, but he proffered all the intangible accoutrements of spirituality.

Fake? Hack? Snake oil salesman? Charlatan? Scam artist?

No no, please call him Maha Rishi.

* The quirky and forward-thinking Canadian TV (CBC) show, “Little Mosque on the Prairie,” is being adapted (and potentially ruined) by FOX. Even if it doesn’t make it to air, this is progress. Unless it’s some kind of feeder for “24″ villains. Ugh. Props to writer Zarqa Nawaz, as she has created a show unlike anything currently around. The desi moment is that she’s of Pakistani origin, BTW.

And she answered some questions after the pilot aired. Watch the pilot (takes a long time to load). [Thanks Nirali Magazine]

[PART 2 OF 2] TO ALTER the course of my thinking, Former-DM Gal inquired how our parents ever would have found a place if everyone thought like me.

I reflected. Our parents needed a start somewhere too. They also were clean and considerate and not morons, therefore they would have responded to the initial inquiries in the posting properly.

But this wasn’t enough to get me off the hook, was it? I condemned the LA redneck, yet I saw an international student, then a fellow brown man, and I did the same thing. I felt at peace with it because I “know” the difference. I have a better feeling for who would be dirty, flaky, and inconsiderate. But even taking my Indian knowledge into account, am I being fair from one person to another?

Former-DM Gal said maybe I should give the guy a chance. I didn’t know him personally. Checking my email later, as I wondered if perhaps she were right:

Hay please contact me on 310-806-2649

Nitin Tabu

But I knew enough. I’m sharing my living space, and if he flakes, I’m paying double rent.

Fair ends at my emaciated wallet.

[PART 1 OF 2] I LIKENED THE JOURNEY of finding a new roommate to being a female inmate in a maximum security prison, locked in a death match with a hefty con named Big Sally, beating one another senseless with food-specked lunch trays until one of us no longer can stand.

This is what it was like when I looked for a roommate on Craigslist.org and encountered, and even generated, racism.

[Blogger: S.I.] Be proud. A day we never thought would come has in fact arrived. A South Asian on the front page of ESPN.com…

* For spelling (at least it’s something). Young Samir Patel and his life after the bee, courtesy of ESPN.com. Good to see a smart kid who’s not afraid of being smart (not that the desis ever had such problems. We probably could use more humility. But not this kid).

And realistically, I don’t know the next time we’ll see another brown person on ESPN.com like this again. Enjoy it.

Personally, I’ve always felt (and gotten the vibe from East Asians and East Asian Americans) that Indians and Asians are indeed two separate groups. The concept of Asia is just what white people drew on a map as “East of Where White People Live”-land, and I don’t feel like abiding by their construct. Beyond our basic looks, our cultures, while vaguely similar, are still quite different, as are the religions and lifestyles.

* Adhir Kalyan, whom we blogged about in our review of the CW’s “Aliens in America,” bagged a role as an up-and-coming wunderkind doctor on FX’s “Nip/Tuck.” Amazingly, the writers of the show displayed their all-world creativity when they named the character “Raj.” On a happier note, that boy is going to get LAID, both on the program and in real life, because of his role on that show. It’s LA, you know. And I 100% support the sexual objectification of the Indian male by women as well as the resulting residual play from the trickle-down effect. [Thanks Angry Asian Man]