Desi Manifesto Blog: The Forum for South Asian American Men

[Blogger: S.I.] As it’s a new year (well, not if you follow the Hindu Calendar), I figured it would be appropriate to draw up some resolutions for myself and desi fellows in general. Although I’m not one to make resolutions, because you can change any day you want to, not just Jan 1, we might as well take a look at some things that are worth doing (or not doing) in the coming 366 or so days (leap year people). Much like the electric rickshaw to the right, it’s all about modifying what works and dropping those things that pollute you. Or something more clever than that.

I resolve…

* to pay more attention to politics. Incredible disillusionment followed the elections of 2000 and 2004, but now that Bush is required to leave office, maybe my vote matters again.

* to wear these fancy Indian clothes my parents gave me at least once a year. This, I believe, actually is easier for girls, because women’s sections in US stores steal Indo fashions and convert the price from rupees to dollars at a 1 to 1 rate.

* to tone down the negative vibes towards white guys. Most of them are good peeps, some of them really do know about the culture, and while many of them are simply ignorant, when it comes to dating beautiful Indian girls, they’re doing the same thing most of us would do if propositioned by a hot white girl.

* to run like hell if ever pursued by a group of white dudes in wife beaters driving a pickup truck that may or may not fly Confederate flags. These would be the white dudes who do not qualify as “good peeps.”

* that when I board an airplane, I will not glare at all the people staring at me. I don’t know for sure that they think I’m a terrorist. I only suspect it.

* to shave before I go to the airport.

* to be more understanding when I see an Indian girl with a white guy. Maybe she tried Indo guys and likes them, but it didn’t work out, and this white guy’s the best she’s been with.

* And, before I hurt myself, I also resolve to hold Indian girls responsible when they trash their own race and brown men. Norah Jones gets a pass because of her mixed lineage and Ravi Shankar’s absentee parenting, but very few others do.

* to recognize that being Indian is part of our identity, but our identity is not being Indian. Don’t let outsiders pigeonhole you, and most of all, don’t pigeonhole yourself. I will now continue to write for this South Asian blog…

* to learn more about other cultures. It’s stupid to complain that people don’t understand your culture if you don’t make the effort to get someone else’s.

* to stop suggesting Indian food as the first option when a business contact wants to meet up for lunch. People will think of it as an extension of me, and they probably think I’ll be offended if they don’t like desi food. Also, I should quit doing this because if the person declines, I do in fact think that s/he is rejecting an extension of me, and I want to take it personally.

* to keep learning about the motherland’s past and present, because that has something to do with the FOBs who raised us, and it will be relevant to the FOBs we meet in the future, so it has much to do with us as well. Just don’t get so caught up in the past that you can’t see the present on its own terms.

* to never be one of those ethnies who bashes his country of residence while touting how great his homeland is, because these are the people who use America for everything and never actually move back to where they came from. I don’t agree with many things America has done, but India isn’t perfect either. Bottom line, my parents couldn’t have succeeded so well anywhere but the US, or possibly Canada. On a brighter note, India is really changing for the better, so who knows, one day people may be moving back.

* to unite with the other minority groups. I despise Indians being racist, because it means we haven’t learned shit from our colonized and marginalized past. See the struggles of Indos in South Africa or the UK to know what it’s like. Indians have no right to inflict the same bigotry on others in the US, and within Africa itself. Then again, we are a culture with the malevolent caste system, so apparently hating on others has been with us for quite some time. And for those of you who say that the caste system was meant to be a division of labor, not elitism, bla bla bla, I say that you need to open your eyes and look at the modern day results. I’m sure someone will say guns were only meant for protection, but how has that worked out?

* to pay more attention to my mom’s stories and to get her to write them down. It’s an entertaining and informative part of the culture, and by the time I’m her age, it’ll be long gone.

* to continue cheering, even if it’s only to myself, every time I see a brown man pimping a girl of another race. I also resolve to cheer harder when the girl is white, because while guys like me play defense, we need someone to play offense every once in a while, even if only to let some Indian girls know that they’re missing out on us. I hope this does not conflict with earlier resolutions.

* that I will hang out with non-Indos enough that I’m not shocked when I’m in the same room with one in a social situation. Got to keep the scope broad in order to expand your mind.

* to worship the outstanding Indian girls out there. They do exist (shout out to my girlfriend–feel free to vomit), and when you include the ones who are at least decent human beings, there may be enough to sustain you. Just don’t take them for granted.

* to avoid staying at hotels and motels labeled “American Owned.” Unless they are run by desis who are mocking the bigoted slogan.

* that I will accept criticism of the blog, because we want to make it better. Doesn’t mean we’ll actually implement what you say, but hey, it’s worth a shot.

Good luck in the new year, and thanks for your continued interest.